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Sunday, April 22, 2007 5:28 AM
22 April 2006

12.28pm

today is the 1st anniversary of the 06 outdoor assesment syf.

thinking back, i miss those times in high school. chs life was so much more care-free then what it is now. i didn't have to care who i talked to, what i talked about or why i was talking and stuff like that. i didn't have to study at all. my studies weren't in such deep shit. i didn't have to do so much thinking about non-academic stuff. life was so much simpler and straightforward compared to what it is one year on. argh.

let's compare.

life 1 year back was all about:

> owning other schools in outoors syf
> how to make mrs ke and chen lao shi even more pissed
> wrecking the classroom
> thinking of new stuff to do during class time
> wondering what to do with all the ya zhou zhou kan stuffed in the lockers, cupboards, drawers and everywhere else in the classrooms
> who to play cards with after school

life 1 year later is so much harder. you see:

> trying much harder to get a gold for syf this year. (just a gold, not to own)
> trying to no avail to study
> getting good results without studying
> having to be wary of backstabbing ppl and who you talk to
> having to mind your language and topics covered during conversations
> trying to manage time between band homework and slack time
> still missing S60
> still trying to fully assimilate into chinatown and S6J
> dealing with various teachers on my academic disaster
> meeting ppc over me slamming some teachers on my blog
> monetary woes due to escalating phonebills
> practicing for syf
> how to form a compromise for everyone's demands
> trying to get more motivation to do important stuff. like mugging and lessons
> trying to keep awake during lessons
> trying to balance my social and academic life

you see?

so much less stuff to worry abt. and now i've got to figure out some way to pass my physics test tmr and absolutely own my maths class test on tuesday. if not i'm screwed.

and i suddenly miss the time i spent with 07S60 a lot. as in A LOT. i was trying to find my notes hidden somewhere on physics and i just chanced upon this stack of old term 1 worksheets all ~~copied~~ done with 60 and i just missed S60 like crazy all of a sudden. i guess i'm just prone to stuff like this.

i don't really like life in jc anymore. its so much more stressful. i don't know.

sometimes i feel as if i shouldn't care so much and do stuff like break my already strained relationship with some ppl in my new class (i think) and just heck it but i'm not sure if its beneficial for me. i just don't know anymore.

i'm not so sure of myself now, and if i'm not showing it then uhh yea i'm less assured as compared to last time. i don't know if i'm making the right choices sometimes. um like i play and slack with people during school time, but they study when they go home (i'm sure this time.) and i sleep when i go home. so i'm not really sure if i should play and slack during lessons. its not beneficial for me, but its what i come to school for. not for lessons, but for friends. school would be pretty meaningless for me if i were so disciplined.

i'm less confident of myself this year, maybe its because of this new environment shit and stuff like that, but its different and i just don't like it.

"hwachong institution military band - DISTINCTION."

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